Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Oh, hell yeah, mutha fucker!

DEUS EX MOUSENA: Turns out Mr. BoDuckets chewed through the electric-chair power cord, sacrificing his life for mine.

Because I am only a dangerous felon and likely a depraved sexual predator, I have been released on my own recognicen-- recog-- recognisin-- fuck it-- I had to promise to be good! Fortunately, I didn't have any pot on me when I was arrested, or else they would have locked me up and thrown away the key.

Anyway, regular blogging will resume momentarily. First, let's take a moment to remember the Sainted Mr. BoDuckets.



Now, back to the pimp shit: I'm way behind on Blogging, and have a LOT that needs be said. I need your help, so please take the
JOHN LAYMAN INTERACTIVE BOLLAH BLOG CHALLENGE.

I will blog based on YOUR requests, and prioritize blogs in order of what YOU DEMAND. Here we go. Please leave a comment casting your vote about you want me to blog about. Unlike America in the year 2000, majority vote rules.

Potential blog subjects:
1.) A dynamic new cat picture. (Spoiler warning: potentially too cute for words.)
2.) Terrible, devastating news about Rufus
3.) A new obituary for Eric DeSantis
4.) An insiteful Layman movie reivew
5.) An angry blog about that Brian Perez, an idiot crushed under the enormous weight of his own fat head.
6.) "Blogmerican Idol," my next inane ratings stunt
7.) A Terry Shiavo parody. (Warning, might include jokes about Tom B. Long wrongly inserting his own "feeding tube.")
8.) A boring post about books. No, dillrod, not comic books. Books. Yawn.
9.) Your own half-assed write-in vote.


Vote today. Remember, just like Ohio, multiple votes count. Unless you are black or gay, that is, or otherwise undesirable.

16 comments:

Mary E. Brickthrower said...

DYNAMIC NEW CAT PICTURE!!! KITTIES RULE!!! (Ze Moto Kitty, my stunning tuxedo cat, is prepared to steal the throne from yours as cutest cat ever.)
~mary e. brickthrower
++++++++end of transmission++++++++

.just.a.ghost. said...

1.) "Blogmerican Idol," my next inane ratings stunt
2.) An angry blog about that Brian Perez, an idiot crushed under the enormous weight of his own fat head.
3.) A Terry Shiavo parody. (Warning, might include jokes about Tom B. Long wrongly inserting his own "feeding tube.")
4.) A new obituary for Eric DeSantis
5.) An insiteful Layman movie reivew
6.) A boring post about books. No, dillrod, not comic books. Books. Yawn.
7.) Terrible, devastating news about Rufus
8.) A dynamic new cat picture. (Spoiler warning: potentially too cute for words.)

And my write in to be placed as you please: Another installment in the life of the erotic Layman!

That would just make my blog day!

Anonymous said...

Blogmerican idol, homie. I enjoy reading this crap that passes off as entertainment.

-Jess

Ann Thrope said...

1. A dynamic new picture of Eric Desantis
2. A blog where all the words are actually spelled correctly
3. Some insightful observations about why your roommate ROCKS!

Tom said...

3) SHIAVO!!!

Sabrina said...

cat pictures are a must.
Layman movie reivew.
"Blogmerican Idol," my next inane ratings stunt, no idea what this is but um, yeah.

-Sabrina

thor said...

1.) But will they really be dynamic?
2.) Rufus Trimble from the 3rd grade? Isn't he dead?
3.) How do you think the Mother DeSantis feels about you killing her son? Huh?
4.) Insightful Layman movie review of: 'Fat Albert', 'Valley of Fire', and 'Bring Me The Head of Alfredo Garcia'
5.) Sounds too gory. Stick with what you ... oh, wait ...
6.) What about "Blog American Style" filled with trite but hearfelt stories about common people reading/writing blogs from all walks of life?
7.) Hmmmm ... some real potential here.
8.) How boring could it be? The Mighty Layman vs. The Mighty Trope. Those ringside seats might be worth a pint.
9.) see 1-8

Anonymous said...

1. I would like to see an article about the difference between tofu and custard.

2. Layman's least favorite sexual position

3. A trip to the city morgue (tie that into #2)

4. A how-to segment

5. A day in the life of segment

6. The straight poop on Tom Peyer

7. A dangerous cat picture

8. A look into the future segment

9. Layman in a bikini

-DWD

Anonymous said...

1. I would like to see an article about the difference between tofu and custard.

2. Layman's least favorite sexual position

3. A trip to the city morgue (tie that into #2)

4. A how-to segment

5. A day in the life of segment

6. The straight poop on Tom Peyer

7. A dangerous cat picture

8. A look into the future segment

9. Layman in a bikini

-DWD

Edco said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Edco said...

1) Eric DeSantis loves unwarrented attention. Perhaps his bakery could get a publicity bump if her really DID die.

2) I'm just not seeing enogh coverage of the Shiavo case. So perhaps a 'parody' will suffice.

3) Layman's Movie Review of The Village completely ruined it for me, I was so looking forward to watching the DVD one rainy night. I sure hope he can screw up Million Dollar Baby for the 4 people who haven't seen it yet.

4) A post about books? Layman READS? I thought his blogs were dictated to a highly trained monkey.

Christian said...

A combination! Dynamic cats reviews! I've been wondering how that Bumblebuzz holds up against the others.

N. J. Pozner said...

I vote for Blogmerican Idol. All the other stuff can come later. I demand "sweeps weeks" level entertainment. Don't hold back your best stuff like some pussy TV network, Layman.

TomB said...

I'm gonna have to vote write-in as all the options are substandard. Let's read the series-

"Things Layman put in his mouth while drunk"

Anonymous said...

Things that Layman has dribbled from his nose in view of Coffee revelations.

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