Friday, July 29, 2005

Layman Movie Reviews: COMIC BOOK BAD GIRL TRIPLE PLAY



Holy crap! This movie was ass. The first 35 minutes felt like they were written by a retard--on acid--with a crayon lodged so far up his nose its affected what little was left of his cognative functions. I guess the writers felt like they needed to go through all sorts of contortions to explain how a character that "died" in Daredevil was brought back to life. But their "explaination" is just a bunch of senseless flashbacks and meaningless garbage, and by the time the story started --35 fucking minutes in-- I was reaching for a box of crayons to shove one up my nose and put myself out of my misery. For my money, this was MUCH worse that the much-maligned Catwoman. Between Alias, which is pure fucking nonsense, and Elektra, I figure Jennifer Garner pretty much deserves Ben Assfleck.



This movie was horrible, true, but nowhere near as bad as what I thought it would be. From what I heard, this was the worst cinematic travesty in years, even worse than Chronicles of Riddick, but, like I said, I didn't think it was near as stupid as Elektra, and no more stupid or insulting than 90% of the crap that comes out of Hollywood. I guess the the best part of this was that it was a wake-up call to the douchbags at Time-Warner to have a little more respect for the characters. I dunno. Maybe that's just wishful thinking on my behalf.



On the other hand, this movie was straight-out GREAT! Up there with my favorite comic book movies, if not my favorite. Keep in mind, the Punisher will never be more than a B-Movie, because it is basically "Death Wish" with a guy in a black skull T-shirt. But I thought this movie had a good mix of gore with ham & cheese, and Thomas Jane did a good job as the Frank Castle. I also think bringing in John Travolta in was a masterstroke. Travolta has jumped the shark long ago, and doesn't even make an effort at acting anymore. So he just mugs and makes a cartoon of himself--and he's absolutely perfect. Also, this movie seemed to borrow quite liberally from Garth Ennis' early Punisher issues, which I enjoyed tremendously. Anyway, I thought this was a good movie, and it's even better if you have a good buzz while you are watching it.

3 comments:

.just.a.ghost. said...

agreed in all three accounts.

Anonymous said...

When Punisher kills more cars than people you know something is wrong.

Not managed to stay awake to watch all of Elektra yet.

Mark P

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