Friday, April 29, 2005




The competition is getting pretty fierce now, and we figure it's high time to throw a monkey wrench into the proceedings. In the spirit of true survivors, we thought it would a good time to give people a chance to GUARANTEE them to be spared from next week's eLAYMANation.

So we are issuing an IRON PHOTOSHOP challenge. Anyone who participates, as long as their entry is not totally half-assed, can NOT be eLAYMANated. We also allow cartoons in the event you don't have a Photoshop-type program. However, Photo-manipulation takes priority (and is funnier,) so if everybody submits an entry, Photos will win over cartoons.

Baby DeSantis

Eric DeSantis, in his palid Litany of Schist blog, claimed he was a Gerber Baby from 1973-1975. Honestly, Eric, did you think that would go unnoticed? That it would not come back to torment you? Eric, you fool! First of all, I don't think Eric was even BORN in 1973-1975, so this is clearly a lie.

So let's make fun of Eric, shall we? Your mission is to answer this question: "How ELSE did one-time Gerber Baby Eric Desantis spend his childhood?" Just so you know, sticking Eric's face on a jar of Gerber Baby food is lame. Having Michael Jackson dangle Baby DeSantis off a balcony is funny. Baby DeSantis in an Anne Geddis print? That's funny too. Baby DeSantis as the fuckin' brat in the Quizno's commercial? Not funny.

Note: actual baby pictures are grounds for immediate dismissal from the competition, you will be permanently blocked from access to this blog and your cable company will disable your high-speed connection.

Anyway, anybody who posts an Eric manipulated picture on their blog and sends me a link is automatically immune from next Thursday's eLAYMANation. As for the people who don't have Photoshop, it's time to catch up to the 21 Century, don't you think?

You have your marching orders, troops!

Oh, and Deadline to post is next Wednesday. No more than two pictures per contestant (or individual blog, in the case of dual-contender Darlene.)


Anonymous said...

THE DOGCATCHER SAYS: What is with this unhealthy obsession with Eric?
Next thing you know, you'll be reading comics and playing with toys.

Anonymous said...

Prophecy foretells that the AntiChrist would be a Gerber baby. Has someone checked his bar code?
I've got a squirt gun that was blessed by John Paul II. If we fill it with holy water and shoot this DeSantis chap, we will get to the bottom of this. --King S.

.just.a.ghost. said...

My entry is up for anyone who cares to see...