Ug. I just knew it. I attended an exclusive preview screening of the upcoming Star Warts prequel and it was every bit as half-assed and idoticallly knuckle-headed as I thought it would be.
In honor of this movie, I'm going to start a new feature in this blog, titled:
Layman expose: REASONS WHY GEORGE LUC-ASS IS A BIG FAT IDIOT, Part One (of Infinity)
Ok, so... at the end of the Return of the Sith, Natalie Portman's character, Paddle-Me Armadillo, dies in childbirth, while giving birth to Luke and Leiar. Hello? Your frickin' galaxy has swords made of lasers, machines that resist gravity, and giant ships big enough to destroy planets. And yet, you can't master childbirth. How idiotically convinient for Episode III's lamebrained story purposes.
Plus, it's not like the character's death-during-childbirth comes as a surprise. Manakin has dreams about it the entire damn movie, and yet nobody takes any precautions. Ug. Double Ug. Anyway, another stupid Star Warts movie down the tubes. At least the misery is over.
And I'm not even gonna get started on the Threepio stuff.
5 comments:
I hope you're joking, because...not to be a continuity maven, but Leia specifically recalls, for luke's benefit, what their mother was like in Return of the Jedi. So, to have her die in childbirth can only mean one thing: Return of the Jedi: Specialer Edition, coming soon to a DVD rack near you.
.rich
If I can jump between the cannon-shots here for a second, I'd just like to say that Mr. Lucas is an A-1 Class media whore on a scale surpassed only by Mr. Barnum during the turn of the other century. Lucas lost the 'eye of the tiger.' After Empire Strikes Back, every movie has sucked harder than a black hole in Cygnus. You may now carry on with your exercises...
It's favorite thing in the world when people loudly declare that they're leaving some online discussion behind. I mean, did you expect farewells? Fanfare? Sobbing? Oh, or how about the rending of our garments?
John, your weblog rocks, if for no other reason than you've already managed to attract more blog drama queens than mine, and I seethe with jealousy.
SEEEEEEETHE!!!!
.rich
Tomb, you pretentious little prick...
Man, you guys have way to much time on your hands. Get a job or something. or maybe try to make your own movie and see what people say about it before you go draging others efferts through the mud.
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