Sunday, January 09, 2005

Layman to Prince of Persia: YOU ARE A SHITTY GAME



This game sucks.

Granted, any game after GTA San Andreas would be a tough act to follow, but this new Prince of Persia fucking blows. I'm gonna have to dig through an entire recycling bin to find the receipt and take this miserable fucker back, but, at this point, I'd rather roll around in a gutter full of raw sewage than play another 10 seconds of this suck-ass piece of crap.

Sad, because I really liked Prince of Persia I: Sands of Times. And Gamespot gave this new Prince of Persia a high rating, and I generally trust Gamespot. But this game blows. The first game had a lot of charm, starting with a narrator recounting the story like it was an old fashioned story-tale. This new fucking nonsense just throws you into an imcomprehensible cut-scene of shit, and then a completely different cutscene of shit, and then straight into bad, dumb action. Worse, there this really cheesy soundtrack of just horrible heavy metal music. Or wanna-be heavy metal, that just doesn't fit in with the game action. Man, this thing sucks.

I guess the reason it got such a high rating is because you get, like, a billion fight combos and a trillion weapons. Maybe it's just the writer in me, but I'd prefer an actual story to having to memorize an infinite amount of button-mashing combos. So, anyway, I can't return this piece of crap fast enough, and I'd advise anybody who who is even thinking about buying this rotten junk to think again and wise up.

Prince of Persia Warrior Within: YOU SUUUUUCKKK!!!!!!!

2 comments:

benjamin adams said...

Hell, I coulda told you that. I'm just a phone call away, cheeseball.

Persia said...

Come on. It wasn't that bad. I thought the game was pretty good. Merry Christmas grumpy pants.